How to Build Your Daughter’s Confidence
Around the age of 9 or 5th grade, girls are typically at a high point in terms of self confidence.
This is why Orchard House begins in 5th grade - to begin girls’ middle schools years from a place of strength. Girls this age believe in themselves and their abilities. Unfortunately, confidence drops significantly during puberty as confirmed by a recent study by polling firm Ypulse and authors Kay and Shipman of the book The Confidence Code for Girls. We can look to the way girls’ brains are developing and some socialization patterns among the causes of this confidence drop.
So what can parents and educators do to help build confidence during these years?
Encourage healthy risk-taking like trying a new activity or sport, performing in a school talent show, or striking up a conversation with someone new. Little steps out of comfort zones, whether they are successful or don’t go as planned, build flexibility and resilience.
Model self-compassion. When you make a mistake, do you speak to yourself like you would speak to a good friend or are you overly critical? It’s important for girls’ to see adults who are kind to themselves.
Strengthen her individual voice by asking her to communicate about her needs, ask questions, and respectfully share her opinion.
